If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door - Milton Berle
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Milton Berle
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? - Milton Berle
You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think. - Milton Berle
Laughter is an instant vacation. - Milton Berle
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. - Milton Berle
Poverty is not a disgrace, but it's terribly inconvenient - Milton Berle